Arbutus Coaching’s Blog

Welcome to Because Life Isn’t a Dress Rehearsal, a blog written by life and business coach Kathy Santini, owner of Arbutus Coaching. This blog contains coaching tips and advice to help you become the most self actualized, effective person you can be, both personally and professionally. If you’re serious about “growing your possibilities,” and transforming your life, then you’re in the right place. My goal in writing this blog is to help you create a life that is easier, bigger, richer and more rewarding than the life you’re living now. So let’s get started shall we, because life isn’t a dress rehearsal and time’s a wastin’.

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Cancer Survival and Attitude: The Power of Positive Thinking About Cancer, Have We Gone Too Far? One Author Says Yes

By arbutuscoaching | October 15, 2009

This morning, CBC Radio’s program “The Current,” featured author Barbara Ehrenreich’s latest book, Bright-sided: How the Relentless Promotion of Positive Thinking Has Undermined America 

In her book, Ehrenreich takes a trenchant look into America’s obsession with presenting a “positive” image at all times and at all costs. Spurred by her own reaction to a bout of breast cancer, Ehrenreich came face-to-face with the near obsessive culture of positivity, which led to her questioning not only what purpose it serves, but how it came to exist.

Ehrenreich’s experience and advice from others, that she had to be positive to beat cancer, is a common experience for many cancer patients. Ten years ago when I was diagnosed with cancer, my own surgeon, just before the surgery, told me that he would do a great job but that I had to work on my positive mental attitude. This scared me even more, and led me to believe that my healing and recovery from cancer was solely dependant on my attitude. Ehrenreich had a similar experience, with many people telling her that in order to heal she should have one kind of feeling or approach and it best be positive.

With the myth busting powers for which she is acclaimed, Ehrenreich exposes the downside of America’s penchant for positive thinking: On a personal level, it leads to self-blame and a morbid preoccupation with stamping out “negative” thoughts. On a national level, some argue that it’s brought America an era of irrational optimism resulting in disaster.

As a life, business and results coach, who has cancer survivors in her practice, I firmly believe in the power of positive thinking. My doctor’s advice wasn’t’ bad. But like all things taken to the extreme, when it doesn’t allow for the full range and spectrum of human emotions, it can be limiting. And there’s also the danger, which I see in my coaching practice, that adopting a positive attitude to the extreme can lead to people living in that Egyptian River called “Denial.” Which, after something serious like a cancer diagnosis, can be a great place to wade in temporarily, I did it myself. But only in the short term. The happiest, most successful people are those who both have a positive mental attitude but are also realistic about their lives.

Food for Thought Determine which side of the spectrum you lean towards, are you too optimistic and wading in that famous Egyptian River, or are you pessimistic to an extreme? After determining this, spend the rest of the week altering your thoughts in the new direction you want to move towards. Over time and with practice, your new attitude will be your fallback position for everything in your life. 

Topics: Surviving Cancer, Success |

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